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A Lot to Learn

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Originally published in: TMNT 30th Anniversary Special
Publication date: May 21, 2014

Story by: Tom Waltz and Bobby Curnow
Script by: Tom Waltz
Art by: Dan Duncan
Colors by: Ronda Pattison

“A Lot to Learn”

Summary:

It’s been less than a month since Raphael was reunited with his brothers and Splinter, and he’s not adjusting very well.  In training practice, his martial arts skills are woefully inadequate as compared to his siblings’ and he continually gets his butt kicked.  Frustrated and angry, Raphael storms out.  Splinter and Leo try to tell him that he’s making great progress, but Raph won’t hear it and leaves.


On the streets, Raph hooks up with Casey and the two go for a night on the town, beating up thugs.  Raph recalls how he thought being reunited with his family was the greatest day of his life, but begins to think that maybe he was more at home on the streets, going it alone.


After they finish for the night, Casey invites Raph over to his place to watch TV.  He assures Raph that his dad is probably passed out and won’t even know he’s there.  Seeing Casey so nonchalantly willing to return home to a broken family, but dedicated to his family nonetheless, Raph realizes he was wrong to walk out.  Raph declines the invitation and decides to head back to the sewer lair to make things right.


As he returns home, he’s met by Splinter.  Raph apologizes for leaving, but Splinter explains that he understands his situation.  Splinter assures Raph that while he still has much to learn from his brothers, his brothers also have much to learn from him.  Raph agrees to stay and continue his training.


Turtle Tips:

*This story takes place shortly after TMNT (IDW) #4.


Review:

The initial arc of the IDW series, “Change is Constant”, was slow and dull and plodding and I didn’t really like it.  Once it was over with, I was more than ready for the narrative to move on and start to get somewhere; to the goodstuff.  It did that, but by skipping ahead past all of Raph’s acclimation to his new family life.  When we see him again, he’s just finishing up his training and is suddenly on the level of his brothers (and is chummy with them like old times).

For the flow of the ongoing series, it was the right move to skip over Raph relearning martial arts and getting to know his family again.  “Change is Constant” took FOREVER to get things started and another issue of Raph learning the ropes would have been a torturous ordeal at the time (this was when there were no other supplementary TMNT books; just the one issue a month).

That said, it’s still a narrative gap and one that needed to be told at some point down the line, when the IDW TMNT series had kicked into gear and we could afford to have a lighter sort of story.

Waltz and Curnow get to the point and “A Lot to Learn” winds up being a vital epilogue to “Change is Constant”.  That arc was all about Raph, getting him back to the family so the storyline could actually begin, and he needed more closer than just a group hug.  We see here that he really isn’t taking getting beat on by his brothers for a month very well, having been top dog on the streets, and he REALLY isn’t warming up to them, as his memories haven’t been restored and these are brothers he hardly knows.

Using Casey as the means for Raph to come to his senses was an interesting choice, though it’s just a little problematic.  Raph sees Casey’s devotion to his deadbeat dad as a source of inspiration; to never give up on your family even when times are tough.  But Casey, uh, his devotion to his deadbeat dad wasn’t exactly ever a GOOD thing and his life didn’t start to improve until he found the courage to walk out on him (and join his “real” family; the Turtles).  If Raph could look into the future and see the events of TMNT Microseries #6: Casey Jones, and how self-destructive Casey was by staying with a family member that kicked his ass every day, he might have walked away with a VERY different message about family.

But, from the perspective of this story, those events are well into the future.  If we look at things from only four months into when IDW started publishing their Ninja Turtle books, the lesson Raph extracts from Casey’s home life doesn’t seem so counterintuitive.

“A Lot to Learn” is an important story and really improves the transition between “Change is Constant” and “Enemies Old, Enemies New”.  It’s a short epilogue, so it doesn’t slow the pace of the arc down to any noticeable degree.  A shame it probably came too late in the game to be included in the TMNT IDW Collection Volume 1 hardcover (which reprints the first 12 issues of the ongoing, plus the first 5 Microseries issues in chronological order).


Grade: B- (as in, “But I guess the important distinction is that Mr. Jones beats up Casey because he’s a drunken loser and the Turtles beat up Raph because they love him”.)

TMNT Anime OVAs (1996) Review: Mutant Turtles: Superman Legend

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TMNT Anime OVAs (1996) Review: Mutant Turtles: Superman Legend.

Just a heads up: I really don't like anime.  Still, I had to cover these things sooner or later.

Lots of sites have reviewed these OVAs in the past, so I tried to focus my article more on providing information about the Super Turtles franchise and the Japanese broadcast of the series that led into it.

But yeah, I'm glad I won't have to go through this again.

The Last of the Viking Heroes Summer Special #3

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Publication date: April, 1991
Published by: Genesis West Comics

Drawn and written by: Michael Thibodeaux
Inked by: Marty Lasick, Michael Thibodeaux (pgs. 1, 21, 28-29, 31)
Painted and lettered by: Richard French
Cover: Michael Thibodeaux and Richard French
Special thanks to: Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird

Summary:

Part 1:

Splinter fears that an old nemesis of his, Professor Zion, plans to travel back in time and alter the past so that he, the Turtles and Ted Koppel will never exist.  To counter his foe, Splinter deploys the Turtles to stop him.  The Turtles arrive at his lab too late, as Zion and his robot henchmen vanish on his time platform. 


Looking at a video monitor, they see that Zion has arrived in the year 1048 and has used his time there to construct a great fortress.  One of Zion’s robots confronts a Viking warrior whom Leonardo recognizes as the legendary Erik (mostly because the Viking is wielding an enchanted sword forged from “unobtainium” which damages the robot).

In 1048, Erik is joined by Tomgar and Jon who seek to stop Zion’s takeover of their kingdom.  Tomgar attacks, but is felled by an energy bolt from Brazer (one of the robots).  Erik and Jon reluctantly flee to concoct a strategy.  Zion is furious, as he needs the enchanted sword to rule the world, but figures he can get it by using Tomgar as a hostage and takes him into his fortress.

In 1991, the Turtles decide they have to do something (as Michelangelo vaguely recognizes the Viking Heroes from a dream he once had).  Leonardo and Michelangelo agree to go back and help the Viking Heroes, but Raphael and Donatello are still on the fence.  They witness Zion and Brazer torturing Tomgar, though, and make up their minds to go help (Don being especially impressed by Tomgar’s devotion to his friends).  Together, they pile onto the time platform and hit the switch.

Part 2:

In 1048, Erik, Jon and Sven are praying to their gods for help.  Suddenly, the Turtles appear in a flash of light.  Erik and Sven want to fight, but Jon says he feels a kinship with them and knows that they’ve come to help.  Going over the layout of Zion’s fortress, they determine that the only way in is through a door locked by a digital key number.  Erik recalls that only Zion’s assistant, Brenda, seems to know the code, and she leaves the fortress every Wednesday to get her nails done.


Erik seduces Brenda and gets the access code from her, promising to visit her in bed after dark.  That night, the Turtles and the Viking Heroes find the gate guarded by a robot.  Leo motivates himself with a poster of Ted Koppel and attacks.  Leo is knocked back by a laser blast.  The robot then destroys Mike’s surfboard, causing the Turtle to go on a rampage.  Grabbing Erik’s enchanted sword, he fells the robot.  Don uses the access code to open the gate while Jon leaves to fetch someone named “Windom” who might help the Turtles when all is said and done.

Part 3:

Searching the fortress, Donatello finds Tomgar and frees him from his chains.  Zion and Brazer then enter the dungeon and Tomgar challenges the robot henchman to a fistfight.  Amused, Zion allows it.  Tomgar gets trounced until he recognizes a weakness in the robot’s midsection.  With a precision kick, he cuts the robot in half.  Zion orders Brazer to use his laser, but Tomgr dives out of the way at the last second.  The laser kills Zion and, having failed in its duty, Brazer initiates its self-destruct sequence.  The Turtles and the Viking Heroes (and Brenda) escape just as the fortress explodes.


With the time platform destroyed, the Turtles aren’t sure how they’ll get home.  Jon then arrives with the dimensional traveler, Windom, who uses his powers to open a portal to 1991 (though he can’t be sure of the location).  Don gives Tomgar a big hug and the Turtles bid their friends farewell.  Erik asks if the Turtles will ever return and Michelangelo assures him that decision is up to “Mr. Eastman”.  Returning to 1991, the Turtles find themselves outside Mann’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood.  They promptly buy four tickets to the showing of “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze”.

Back in 1048, several Vikings find Leo's Nightline poster featuring a headshot of Ted Koppel.  This image causes all the Vikings to give up violence, talk out their differences and become civilized, thus changing the course of history.


Turtle Tips:

*Though the second to be published, this is chronologically the third TMNT/Viking Heroes crossover.

*Michelangelo recalls meeting the Viking Heroes in a dream and an editor’s note says the encounter happened in Turtle Soup (Vol. 2) #1.  The story, “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle”, was actually published almost a year after this one, in the pages of Turtle Soup (Vol. 2) #4.  There must have been a delay.

*Jon feels he somehow knows the Turtles (vaguely recalling having been turned into one in Last of the Viking Heroes Summer Special #2).

*This issue was collected in The Last of the Viking Heroes Limited Edition.

*As a bonus, this issue also included a sketch of the alternate cover design by Thibodeaux.


Review:

So this was kind of a dumb comic; easy on the “kind of”.  The first “crossover” with the Viking Heroes was definitely neat because it wasn’t really a crossover.  It was very original and unique as compared to the endless number of other TMNT guest appearances in indie comics, so it stood out to me and I enjoyed it for what it was.  The second crossover (chronologically) wasn't much, but it was short and sweet and featured a pin-up from Jack Kirby.

This story, the second TMNT/Viking Heroes crossover published but the third one in sequence, has nothing noteworthy going for it whatsoever.  It hits upon all of the same clichés that pretty much every other TMNT guest appearance does, goes through the motions and then it ends. It’s hard to have a strong opinion about this comic when everything about it is without ambition and unforgivably bland.

In terms of his script, Thibodeaux gets the ball rolling as fast as possible with a wacky setup for the Turtles that begins in medias res.  Apparently Splinter has his own super villain archnemesis and the Turtles are out to stop him once and for all.  Sure, whatever gets us through this comic faster.  Where Thibodeaux fails in terms of using the Turtles is where nearly every other indie creator who borrowed the Turtles failed: He doesn’t understand ANY of them. 

Thibodeaux, like so many of the indie creators who worked on the Turtles, doesn’t seem to understand that they have individual personalities or, if they do, just what those personalities are.  So we have weirdness like Leonardo being the tech guru who figures out the time platform, leaving Donatello to be a touchy-feely spiritual guy obsessed with the magic of friendship.  I suppose he somewhat gets Raphael right, making him unenthused with everything around him and reluctant to help, but it’s hard to really gauge Raph’s personality in this comic as he hardly says or contributes anything of value.  Then there’s Michelangelo, who is his cartoon and merchandising incarnation.  “Cowabunga dudes!  Go green machine!  Mondo tubuloso!  Holy guacamole!  Pizza pizza pizza!  Surf’s up!  Gnarly!”  I think I’m going to gag.

I’m nearing the bottom of these miscellaneous publications done by guest creators, so this might be the last time I get to say it: I really, REALLY hate it when the guest creators do this.  They approached Mirage to get permission to use the Turtles and yet they don’t seem to understand or care about ANY of them.  The Turtles display no personalities that would imply the creators knew a damn thing about them and their inclusion is more a formality than a privilege.  Like so many other creators, it’s evident that Thibodeaux used the Turtles not because he cared for or appreciated the characters, but because “Turtlemania” was in full swing and this was his chance to boost his sales and get his name to a wider audience.

It’s loathsome.

The rest of the script is peppered with crap running gags and a paint by numbers plot complete with a self-destruct mechanism to illustrate how little effort Thibodeaux was putting into writing this thing.  In regards to the running gags, that Ted Koppel shit wasn’t funny the first, second or third times he pulled it.  And yet it went on and on and on.

I suppose where this comic succeeds is in the art department.  Thibodeaux is a MUCH better artist than he is an author.  And that brings me to a tangent...  

The early ‘90s were this weird time in the comic industry where there was a backlash against writers; artists felt that writers were getting too much credit and minimizing their own storytelling contributions.  You had animators like John Kricfalusi going on the warpath, claiming in no uncertain terms that writers had no place in a visual storytelling medium (be it animation or comics).  Jack Kirby’s conflicts with Stan Lee were becoming wider known, as Kirby claimed that Lee never wrote a single story or line of dialogue and that the “writers” at Marvel and DC simply slapped their names on the hard work of the artists (the ultimate truth behind Kirby's claims are still a matter of debate).  Then there was the rise of the Superstar Artist; guys like Todd McFarlane and Jim Lee and Rob Liefeld and other Image Comics royalty.  Image Comics in itself was meant to be a place where artists could tell the stories they wanted without icky writers getting in the way.

The point I’m getting at is that the early ‘90s were a time in comics when writers were being dismissed and artists were taking center stage.  As a result, a LOT of artists decided that since they do all the REAL work, they might as well write their own comics, too.

And that’s how we all found out that just because you can DRAW a comic, it doesn’t mean you know how to fucking WRITE one.  And Thibodeaux is exactly that.

Thibodeaux’s art is excellent, going for that faux-Silver Age style with the chapter breaks introduced with splash pages.  He’s perhaps a bit too influenced by Jack Kirby (it seems his infatuation with Kirby went beyond professional respect and entered the creepy zone of obsessive idol-worship) and at times feels less like an homage and more like a pastiche, but the end result is still a rather pretty comic.  

Thibodeaux’s Turtles are… uniquein appearance and I’m honestly not sure where he got so many of his design cues.  The Turtles have huge, flared nostrils and dog-like muzzles, accompanied by large fangs and these weird pincer-like spikes protruding downward from their jaw-line.  Throw in the inexplicable talons jutting out of their fingers and they wind up having this Oriental dragon vibe going on.  I’m guessing that’s what Thibodeaux was going for, anyway.  It’s one of the strangest interpretations of the Turtles, but it sticks out (probably the only memorable thing in this whole issue).

This is not a good comic; at least, not all of it.  Thibodeaux’s art is wonderful, but he’s another one of those artists that just didn’t have the chops to also be a writer (like, well, most of the Image Comics founders).  This is the blandest of stories punctuated with a string of moronic gags and it’s more fun to flip through and look at than to actually sit down and read.  The other two TMNT/Viking Heroes crossovers had something about them that made them “neat”, even if it was just a brief gimmick.  This one offers nothing.


Grade: D (as in, “Did Mr. Eastman ever give the TMNT the go-ahead for another visit to 1048?  Doesn’t look like it.”)

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

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Originally published in: Turtle Soup (Vol. 2) #4
Publication date: February, 1992

Story and art: Mark Thibodeaux, Jack Kirby (page 5)
Color: Guy Romano

“Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle”

Summary:

Down in the sewer lair, the Rambo marathon is disturbed when a rainstorm cuts off the TV reception.  While the other Turtles leave to grab a pizza, Michelangelo decides to stay behind to catch up on his (comic book) reading.  Absorbed in an issue of The Last of the Viking Heroes, Mikey gradually drifts off to slumber-land…

Michelangelo suddenly finds himself on a ship.  Jon and Erik of the Viking Heroes are happy to see him, as Tomgar has had too much mead and can’t properly fight a troll that has attacked them.  They deck Mikey out in Viking gear and send him against the troll, but the brute beats him senseless.  Realizing he has to fight like a ninja, not a Viking, Mikey discards the gear, whips out his nunchakus and attacks the hairy creature.


Going for the kneecaps, he knocks it off balance and then sends it hurtling into the sea.  The Viking Heroes thank Mikey for his bravery, but all he wants to know is how to get home.  Jon tells him that he simply has to click his nunchakus together and say “there’s no place like home…”

Mikey awakens back in the lair, floored by how realistic that dream was.  He decides to stop reading comics and catch a good movie, as he figures a flick won’t give him any weird dreams.  Of course, he begins watching “A Nightmare on Elm Street”…


Turtle Tips:

*Although it was the third published, it is the second TMNT/Viking Heroes crossover in sequence.

*Jon was transformed into a “teenage mutant ninja turtle” in The Last of the Viking Heroes Summer Special #2.  All four Turtles will travel through time to meet the Viking Heroes in The Last of the Viking Heroes Summer Special #3.

*According to an editor’s note in The Last of the Viking Heroes Summer Special #3, this story was originally supposed to be published in Turtle Soup (Vol. 2) #1.  It apparently met with delays.

*This is the only one of the TMNT/Viking Heroes crossovers not to be collected in The Last of the Viking Heroes Limited Edition.


Review:

So hey, Jack Kirby!

Odd that he isn’t credited in the issue; you’d think “Featuring a pin-up by Jack Kirby” would be a major sales draw.  On the other hand, it’s treated as a neat surprise.  You’re flipping through the Mark Thibodeaux art (which is nice) and then suddenly your eyes are greeted by a splash page with the signature “Jack Kirby” on it.  Yeah, didn’t see that coming.

Now, so far as The King’s art is concerned, this pin-up isn’t exactly his most spectacular work.  I guess it’s more a gimmick or a novelty, but it’s definitely “neat” to see a rendition of Michelangelo as drawn by someone so famous and beloved in the medium.  This actually wasn’t the only time Kirby drew the Turtles, either.  He did a piece of all four TMNT as a gift to Peter Laird:


Eastman’s and Laird’s reverence for Jack Kirby isn’t exactly a carefully guarded secret.  Donatello (microseries) #1 was basically an extended love letter to him, with Kirby being treated as a legitimate “god” in the context of the story.  Eastman and Laird almost went so far as to introduce a Fifth Turtle named, you guessed it, Kirby in the fourth live-action TMNT film that never happened.  Because to Eastman and Laird, Jack Kirby ranks alongside Leonardo di ser Piero da Vinci, Raffaello Sanzio da Urbino, Donato di Niccolò di Betto Bardi, and Michelangelo di Lodovico Buonarroti Simoni as one of history’s finest artists.

Yeah, Eastman’s and Laird’s love of Jack Kirby at times transcended “professional respect” and bordered more on “unhealthy, obsessive idol-worship”.  Or at least it was just a lot of ass-kissing (Kirby was still alive when all of this stuff deifying him was being published).

Anyhow, the Jack Kirby pin-up is really all there is to discuss about this short.  There’s practically no story to it and Thibodeaux’s art, fine as it is, really only exists to frame the Kirby pin-up with some context and nothing more.  It’s neat for its novelty, but that’s about it.


Grade: C (as in, “C’mon, by 1992 Freddy Krueger wasn’t exactly scary anymore”.)

Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #13

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Publication date: April 3 – April 30, 2014

Script: Erik Burnham
Art: Bob Molesworth
Colours: Jason Cardy
Colour assist: James Stayte
Letters: Alex Foot

“Thief in the Night”

Summary:

On the roof of the Metro Museum of Historical Art, the Turtles are casing a samurai exhibit they think may be a target.  Specifically, Leo is afraid that the Nakatomi Blade could be stolen.  Mikey is clueless as to the sword’s significance, so Leo’s spins him the yarn for the millionth time…


Back in the days of Feudal Japan, a samurai and an oni were engaged in a battle that they were too evenly matched to win.  The samurai suggested that they seek out the Nakatomi Blade, a sword whom only the worthy could unsheathe.  The oni failed to pull it from its scabbard, but the samurai succeeded, proving his superiority.

In the present, storytime is interrupted by Fishface and the Foot Clan, who have disarmed the security system and entered the museum.  The Turtles drop in and while Don, Mikey and Raph deal with the Foot Soldiers, Leo takes on Fishface.  As they banter, Fishface lets slip that the Shredder is after the Nakatomi Blade.  Fishface grabs the sword, intending to use it against Leo, but can’t get the blade out of the scabbard.  Leo tells him he’s unworthy.


Fishface kicks Leo’s swords away, but Leo counters by nabbing the Nakatomi Blade.  He then successfully unsheathes it and cuts the tubing feeding Fishface’s gills with water.  Fishface and the Foot Soldiers promptly retreat empty-handed.

Mikey basks in Leo’s glory, believing he was deemed worthy by the blade.  Leo is flattered, but the truth is that the hilt of the sword is merely held fast to the scabbard by a latch and all he had to do was unfasten it.  Before Leo can begin telling more stories about the other exhibits, Don gets the security system working again.  Setting off an alarm, the Turtles make themselves scarce.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #12.  The story continues in Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #14.


Review:

Due to contract and licensing kerflufflery, IDW is unable to distribute their TMNT New Animated Adventures comic in the UK, while Panini is unable to distribute their Nickelodeon TMNT comic in the United States.  So even though we aren’t able to share out comics across the Atlantic, there’s one thing we CAN share: The talent.

Recent issues of TMNT New Animated Adventures have featured stories from Nickelodeon TMNT talent such as Landry Walker, while recent issues of Nickelodeon TMNT have featured stories from TMNT New Animated Adventures talent such as Erik Burnham.  These guys get around.

Burnham brings a different approach to his Nickelodeon TMNT story than the usual stable of writers working on the magazine.  Panini’s past authors have sort of stuck to a rigid formula, but they also try to cram as much plot into as many pages as possible.  Burnham’s story is very light on plot and the majority of the tale is nothing more than witty banter between the characters as they engage in a typical skirmish with the Foot.  It makes for a brisker read than the usual Panini stuff, but it’s also a really fun one as Burnham nails all the Turtles’ voices and gets across the fun of their dynamic.  A BIG part of the actual Nick TMNT cartoon has been the witty dialogue, so its a nice change of pace to see one of these Panini stories focus on that over dense plots.

Anyway, it’s pretty cool to see IDW and Panini sharing their talent in lieu of their content.  When all is said and done, instead of getting reprints, it means we’re all getting more stuff overall.  So maybe one day when the two publishers finally shake hands, there’ll be an even BIGGER catalog to go around between them.


Grade: B (as in, “Burnham’s kind of gotten snarky banter down to an art form.  Case in point: His Ghostbusters ongoing series, which is really good”.)

TMNT (1987) Season 5, Part 2 Review

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These seasons are getting shorter; I'm over halfway through Season 5 of the Fred Wolf produced Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon.  Here's my review of the next 6 episodes:

TMNT (1987) Season 5, Part 2 Review.

All kidding aside, this was a pretty darn good batch of episodes with a LOT of recurring characters and action figure personalities.  It's nice to be able to walk away from one of the Fred Wolf reviews and not want to stab myself.

So thrill to the exploits of popular characters such as Baxter Stockman, Muck Man, Napoleon Bonafrog and the Rat King... As well as a bunch of losers like Big Louie and Pinky McFingers.



TMNT (IDW) #34

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Publication date: June 4, 2014

Story: Kevin Eastman, Bobby Curnow, Tom Waltz
Script: Tom Waltz
Art: Mateus Santolouco
Colors: Ronda Pattison
Letters: Shawn Lee
Editor: Bobby Curnow

Summary:

Outside the church lair, April and Donatello meet up with Casey and Angel.  Casey wanders off to be alone, but Angel goes with April and Donnie to return the anti-gravity gauntlets to Harold Lillja.  When they get there, though, Harold is furious that his tech has been damaged and even MORE furious that they invited a guest into his secret lab.  Angel attempts to introduce herself, but Harold dismisses her and calls her “Preschool”.


Donatello attempts to persuade Harold to help them decode the Fugitoid’s notes so they can stop the Technodrome, but Harold isn’t so sure he wants to risk sticking his neck out again.  As “Preschool” wanders around the lab, she finds an exo-suit Harold had built which includes various gimmicks like light-refraction, body armor, the anti-gravity gauntlets and grenades.  She also finds another one of Harold’s projects: A robot Ninja Turtle.

Down in the lair, Leonardo and Splinter are discussing strategy.  Splinter feels that the Turtles are becoming distracted with General Krang and the Technodrome when they should be focusing their energies on the Shredder and the Foot Clan.  Leo agrees that the Shredder is a threat, but he feels that Krang’s plot is of a larger scope and thus a higher priority.  The argument becomes heated as Splinter insists that while Krang poses a threat to the world, Shredder poses the most immediate threat to his family.


Back at the lab, Harold explains that after Donatello saved him from Baxter Stockman, he felt he needed some security for his own good.  He built the robot turtle in Donatello’s likeness as he believed Donatello possessed all the right physical attributes necessary to adapt into an android.  Angel dubs the robot “Metalhead”, but Harold isn’t impressed.  The two get into an argument and Harold is goaded into activating Metalhead, even though it hasn’t had all the bugs worked out.

Metalhead designates April a threat and attacks her.  Apparently, in his paranoia, Harold input the entire Stockgen staff list into Metalhead’s programming as potential security threats; April included.  Harold attempts to shut Metalhead down, but the robot destroys its own remote.  April and Harold run for cover as Metalhead activates a payload of weaponry, including a flame-thrower, the anti-gravity gauntlets, a machinegun and lasers in both his fists and eyes.  Finally, Metalhead transforms into a four-wheeled battering ram mode and begins trashing the lab.  While this is going on, Angel dons the exo-suit and uses its various functions to eventually put Metalhead offline.  Impressed with how “Preschool” handled the exo-suit, Harold asked if he could get her name again.  Angel replies by saying that she’s just a nobody.


Elsewhere, Lindsey from Stockgen is talking on the phone with her mom while on the way to her car.  Apparently, she’s had trouble finding a job ever since Stockgen blew up, as most of her references have vanished into thin air.  She’s approached by Old Hob and Slash, who offer her a "job" at gunpoint.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from TMNT (IDW) #33.  The story continues in TMNT (IDW) #35.

*Donatello saved Harold from Baxter Stockman in TMNT Microseries #3: Donatello.

*Lindsey last appeared in TMNT (IDW) #15, where she was attacked by Slash.

*This issue also included a bonus look at Metalhead’s character model by Santolouco.

*This issue was originally published with 6 variant covers: Cover A by Santolouco, Cover B by Eastman and Pattison, Cover RI by Xurxo Penalta, Cover RE 1st Print Comics Exclusive by Salvador Otero, Cover RE Amazing Comic Con Exclusive by Mike DeBalfo, and Cover RE Niagara Falls Comic Con Exclusive by Eastman.


Review:

Metalhead!  That old school TMNT character that’s been making a big comeback these past two years, but never really went away.

The idea of a robot Ninja Turtle managed to survive the end of the Fred Wolf cartoon and the original Playmates toyline.  The “Turtlebot” appeared in the 4Kids cartoon and its accompanying Konami video game, while a similar creation called the “Turtlenator” was set to appear in the Dreamwave TMNT comic before it got mercifully canned.  While they weren’t properly "Metalhead", well, they were robot Ninja Turtles so they might as well have been.

But the 2012 TMNT cartoon from Nickelodeon brought Metalhead back as Metalhead and he’s gotten perhaps more development in that show than any other character (I ain’t lyin’).  Now he’s showing up in the IDW comic and I couldn’t be happier.  He was one of those characters from back in the day that I really liked, even if he only appeared in 2 episodes of the cartoon and I think only one of the original Konami video games (Turtles in Time) and then nothing else.  His action figure was bitchin’ and that’s all a 6 year-old really needed.

I enjoy the character of Harold Lillja as he helps alleviate the burden from Donatello when it comes to being the convenient genius with a mastery of every scientific discipline on the books (or "the MacGuffin Dispensary").  Donatello is still smart and capable and handy with a computer, but he isn’t overloaded with skill to the point where he can straight up build things like robot Ninja Turtles or exo-suits (or Party Wagons or Turtle Blimps or Shell Cycles or Sewer Sliders or Shellraisers or you get the idea).  He still has to seek out others to assist him in these wilder areas of technological ability and it makes him feel more on par with his brothers instead of light years ahead of them.  And adding that extra step means his techno-savvy won’t be a convenient solution to every situation.

In addition to Metalhead, another longtime TMNT character makes their surprise IDW debut: Nobody.  It was a clever bit of misdirection on IDW’s part, promoting the Hell out of Metalhead for the past 6 months in all their solicits but not making a peep about Nobody.  I was irritated, as one of my biggest pet peeves with IDW is how they’re constantly spoiling their own stories half a year in advance, and having the debut of Metalhead ruined before the Christmas decorations were even down left me feeling grouchy.  But the ends wound up justifying the means and we still got a surprise reveal in this issue.

Like Metalhead, Nobody’s a character I like who hardly ever got jack shit to do in the media.  The 4Kids cartoon probably treated him with the most dignity, while the Mirage comics scarcely utilized him at all before unceremoniously killing him off in the dumbest way possible ("eaten by a starfish").  Angel evolves into Nobody beginning with this issue (or so I gather) and it’s a fusion of existing characters similar to how IDW’s Slash happens to look like Tokka.  We’ll see how it goes, but it could be neat.  It’s a total departure from the original Nobody (and I’m not just talking about gender), but Angel has been a character IDW’s been trying their best to cultivate since nearly the start of the book (as 4Kids didn’t exactly give them a heck of a lot to work with).

We’ve also got other turmoil going on in this chapter; Casey sulking about Hun, Leo and Splinter butting heads over priorities and Lindsey (remember her?) getting kidnapped by Hob presumably for the purpose of creating his mutant army.  That last one was the big hook (and I’m psyched), but the two-page dialogue between Leo and Splinter was pretty great.  I love stories that try to expose some of Splinter’s seams and by the looks of it the wise old sensei is letting his emotions and personal vendettas blind him from the big picture.  That it’s Leoquestioning his priorities is just gravy.

So this was a wonderful chapter, maybe a little corny in places (Angel’s declaration of her new identity), but it’s got a lot of strong personalities and man oh man if Santolouco didn’t just KILL IT on that fight with Metalhead.  There’s a pair of two-page spreads back to back and with equal doses of action and humor across their numerous panels.  Harold is hilarious in this issue thanks mostly to the wealth of reaction faces Santolouco creates for him.

So if last issue left you feeling cold in the action department, this one cranks it up the notch.  We’ve got familiar characters making their comebacks and some surprise melodrama where you might not expect it.  A solid chapter that was worth the extra month we all had to wait for it (what was up with THAT, anyway?).


Grade: B+ (as in, “By the way, vehicle-mode Metalhead has the Party Wagon’s spoiler.  That might actually round this grade up to an ‘A’ just on principle”.)

Tales of the TMNT (Vol. 2) #16

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Publication date: October 2005

Plot: Steve Murphy and Peter Laird
Script: Steve Murphy and Doug Rice
Pencils: Doug Rice
Inks: Hilary Barta, Phil May and Cory Carani
Tones: Bonaia Rosado
Frontispiece: Sean Wang
Letters: Eric Talbot
Cover: Rice, Barta, Talbot
Letters page header: Dave White

“Sins of the Past”

Summary:

Frontispiece: Staring intently at his computer, Donatello thinks about the things he’s read in books like The Coming Global Superstorm by Art Bell and Whitley Strieber, as well as the things he’s heard on National Public Radio.  He comes to the ironclad conclusion that global warming is real and is the fault of mankind for mistreating the environment.  Exasperated, Don grows weary of all the fools who refuse to accept the truth…

Along with the Fugitoid, Donatello has traveled to the Utrom Homeworld to study their data on global warming.  He fears that mankind (who he refers to as a “malignancy”) will soon destroy the Earth with pollution and deforestation and wants to see if there’s any solution.  Leaving the Homeworld with the data he’s collected, Donatello takes a new Utrom spacecraft for a spin.  Recklessly, he speeds through the galaxy with the faster-than-light drive, worrying the Fugitoid and his Utrom chaperone, Vaschin.


The ship eventually arrives on the edge of known space; a restricted area as per all intergalactic federal laws.  Suddenly, they receive a distress signal from a nearby asteroid and Don insists they check it out, much to Vaschin’s disapproval.  Only sanctioned rescue ships are allowed to respond to distress beacons, but Donatello insists that sometimes it’s necessary to break small laws in order to right bigger wrongs.

Donatello, the Fugitoid, Vaschin and a unit of Utroms disembark on the asteroid and begin following the signal.  They enter a cave where they find a ship that the Fugitoid says looks familiar.  He thinks he’s seen pieces of its design in museums on D’Hoonib, but can’t be sure.  Vaschin is nervous and insists they leave, but Donatello refuses to back down and they go inside.


After only a few minutes, Vaschin gets nervous and begins opening fire at shadows.  Donatello asks why he’s so heavily armed for a rescue mission, but Vaschin says he’s just being cautious.  The Fugitoid finds an Utrom skull and Donatello becomes even more suspicious.  Suddenly, they’re attacked by several gelatinous, tentacled blobs which Vaschin recognizes as the J’Gel race.  There’s a big fight and all the Utroms but Vaschin, and all the J’Gels but one, are killed.  Before Vaschin can kill the J’Gel, the Fugitoid activates his translation programs and asks the J’Gel to tell its story.

According to the J’Gel, its race was a simple people concerned only with survival.  They had the ability to absorb the knowledge of all they consumed, but their propensity for overconsumption and over-breeding nearly destroyed their homeworld and drove them to extinction.  When the Utroms made first contact with them, the J'Gel absorbed their space-faring technology and began spreading across the galaxy, absorbing and destroying other worlds.  The Utroms then began an operation of total racial extermination, hunting down and killing all J’Gels, then wiping all knowledge of their existence (and their activities) clean.  His ship contained the last J’Gels and they were able to hide in the asteroid ruins of their homeworld (which the Utroms destroyed) for thousands of years.


Against Vaschin’s wishes, Donatello and the Fugitoid leave the J’Gel to live alone in peace.  As their ship takes off, Vaschin separates in the escape pod.  Donatello tells him to come back, but Vaschin uses Don’s own words against him, saying that it’s better to commit a smaller crime if it means righting a greater wrong.  Believing the J’Gel are too dangerous to let even one live, he flies his pod into the asteroid, killing himself and the last J’Gel.  Melancholy, Donatello and the Fugitoid return to Earth.


Turtle Tips:

*This story takes place sometime during the six-month gap in TMNT (Vol. 4) #5 when the Turtles were spending all their time with the Utroms.  The frontispiece apparently takes place sometime after 2004.

*More of the Utroms’ unsavory past will be uncovered in the story “First Mud”.  A gelatinous, tentacled creature will be seen on a forbidden planet in that story, though whether it is related to the J’Gel is unknown.

*Donatello’s fears about global warming will eventually prove correct, as climate change caused by pollution will destroy the Earth in Tales of the TMNT (Vol. 2) #69.


Review:

Wow, how incredibly subtle.

Oh fuck it, I’ve complained about Steve Murphy using Tales of the TMNT as his soap box for environmental and political messages enough for one blog.  I’ll just say that nothing in my summary was an exaggeration.  In fact, I left out some details; this thing was a fucking SERMON.

Anyway, “Sins of the Past” struggles to convey some fascinating ideas by means of some very poor execution.  

The idea that the Utroms aren’t the benevolent Nibblonians of the TMNT universe and actually have a pretty spotty history is one that Murphy explored throughout his Professor Obligado serial.  It was handled better in that tale, I think, but “Sins of the Past” does provide a little extra back story that may or may not impact the vagaries of the Obligado serial.  For instance, when Obligado locates the original Utrom Homeworld (hidden from all knowledge for millennia), he finds it to be a desolate mud puddle inhabited only by simple, gelatinous creatures.  I think the gist was that the J’Gel absorbed the original Utrom Homeworld and as part of their campaign to erase the J’Gel from history, the Utrom government concealed the existence of their original Homeworld.

That’s what I came away with, but none of this is stated in any of the text, so it could all just be drawing my own conclusions.

Yeah, the J'Gel were another one of Murphy's dime-a-dozen allegories for the plight of Native Americans: "noble savages" who were slaughtered by a self-proclaimed "civilized culture" which then tried to cover up their acts of mass genocide, blah blah blah.  It's practically a Steve Murphy-ism by now, I don't feel like dwelling on it.

The real problem with “Sins of the Past” which makes this potentially fascinating tale such a chore to read is how brutally out of character Donatello is.  If you look at that credits list, you’ll see that this story suffered from a bad case of “too many cooks” and I’m not really sure where things went wrong or who fucked up at what juncture, but Donatello is AWFUL in this story.

He’s irritable, reckless, casual and rebellious; at a glance, you’d think he was Raphael.  In the letters page of a future Tales issue, someone even brought the matter up.  Murphy explained that Donatello was just “angry” because the Utroms were lying to him, hence his bad attitude and weird characterization in this story.  That explanation doesn’t exactly hold water, as Donatello BEGINS this tale with Raphael’s personality and it runs deeper than just his being “angry”.  He says things Donatello would never say, like “don’t get your panties in a bunch” and even makes “…NOT!” jokes, because that’s totally something Donatello would do, right?  

And jeez, this comic was published in 2005 and the writers still thought it was hip to make “…NOT!” jokes?  Really?

The result is something that’s just bewildering to read.  It feels very patchwork, no doubt a result of all the creators trying to get their licks in, vetoing and contradicting one another during the creative process.  So we end up with this "Turtle" that’s a weird amalgamation of two characters (while his dialogue is the Raph-esque rebel routine, his inner monologue is the typical pontificating Don stuff about the environment and science).

Not helping matters is the artist: Doug Rice.  He’s an Old Boy who goes back to the black and white indie comics scene of the ‘70s and ‘80s, so he has a style that looks noticeably “old fashioned”.  That isn’t the problem, though; I LIKE “old fashioned”.  The problem was that Doug Rice draws Donatello in the same way many of the guest contributors drew all the Turtles for Mirage back in the ‘80s; this vacuous, corporate mascot look.  Donatello is endlessly sneering and grimacing and scowling like the Turtles did on all those action figure packages and trading cards and he cannot emote beyond teeth-gnashing and brow-furrowing.  Combine that look with Donatello’s preposterously un-Donatello-like dialogue, and you have a comic that refuses to make sense regarding its star character.

Donatello aside, Rice’s other art looks just fine.  The Utroms, the Fugitoid, the backgrounds, the layouts… it all looks great.  Very dynamic stuff and I especially liked the off-kilter geometry of the J’Gel spaceship interiors.  The four inkers and toners worked together rather well and it doesn’t have that feel of “this guy clearly inked this page, that guy clearly inked that page” which usually comes about when a quartet of inkers tackle a single issue.

I’d like to say that “Sins of the Past” needed another pass by the editor before going to the art phase, but Steve Murphy WAS the editor on this book!  It’s just hard to believe that Donatello could be written so puzzlingly out of character and that no one publishing the story “noticed”.  There are some good ideas in here and on a basic level it’s a nice companion piece to the Professor Obligado serial, but the execution does its level best to ruin everything.


Grade: D+ (as in, “Donatello was just mad because everyone on Earth is stupid but HIM”.)

Tales of the TMNT (Vol. 2) #54

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Publication date: January, 2009

Script: Andrew Bonia
Pencils: Bob LeFevre
Inks: Mostafa Moussa
Tones: L. Jamal Walton
Letters: Eric Talbot
Cover: Bob LeFevre, Mostafa Mousa, Steve Lavigne
Frontispiece: Michael Dooney

“Mere Appendix”

Summary:

Frontispiece: On the planet Queexox V, Raph is doing battle with a giant dinosaur-like monster that’s trying to eat the Fugitoid.  He says that on this planet, there are lots of stories, but only one about the Fugitoid.  Even worse, it’s a story where Raph is the bad guy…

In a pub on Queexox V, the Turtles are in the midst of a bar brawl.  The Fugitoid apologizes for taking them to such a dive, but they’re more concerned with getting out.  In the midst of the fight, Raph draws his sai back to attack without looking and accidentally spears the Fugitoid through the head.  The Fugitoid goes offline and the Turtles rush to get him some help.


At an Utrom lab, Dr. Oolric repairs all of the Fugitoid’s circuitry with fresh SAL5000 worker droid parts.  However, he fears that due to the Fugitoid’s unique origin there may be irreparable damage to his memory.  Indeed, as the Fugitoid comes to, he proceeds to flicker in and out of moments throughout his life as Professor Honeycutt.

Later, Donatello and the Fugitoid try to work out the problem.  Donatello feels that the menta-wave helmet which transferred his mind into the SAL droid is the key to restoring his memory functions.  Unfortunately, due to his malfunctioning, the Fugitoid can’t remember how he built the device.  Thinking harder, he recalls how the helmet he was wearing was just a prototype which lacked a very crucial component: The component necessary to actually transfer information from one unit to another.  Without that component having been installed, the Fugitoid realizes that the helmet merely sent a copy of Professor Honeycutt’s memories into the SAL droid.  That means that the realHoneycutt died all those years ago and the Fugitoid has never been anything more than a robot programmed with the Professor’s memories.

Naturally, the Fugitoid becomes very distressed, but Don tells him not to jump to any conclusions until they’ve had a chance to look at the menta-wave blueprints.  Raph suggests they go back to Honeycutt’s old lab on D’Hoonib (which is in Federation territory), as it likely hasn’t been touched since he abandoned it.  Donnie and Raph decide to go with the Fugitoid to keep him safe, as he’s still wanted by the Federation military, while Leo and Mike stay behind to keep the motor running on their getaway.

Arriving at the lab, Raph and Don wait outside while the Fugitoid gets to work.  The moment they entered the building they set off an alarm and the Federats dispatched a unit of soldiers to collect them.  Raph, feeling guilty for having caused all of the Fugitoid’s troubles, promises to fight off as many Federats as it takes until the Fugitoid finds what he needs.  The Federats arrive and the Turtles proceed to pick them off one at a time as they move through the forest.


Inside the lab, the Fugitoid finds his burnt out menta-wave helmet and repairs it.  He claims that it is attuned to the mind of Professor Honeycutt and if he isn’t truly the Professor, then the helmet won’t respond to him.  Putting it on, his memories proceed to go crazy, taking him to different points throughout his life (including a time when he was a child and walked in on two Utroms discussing whether or not the Federation was ready for First Contact).  This brings him great pain and, throwing down the helmet, he runs into the forest.

Collapsing from the pain, the Fugitoid decides that since he’s just a machine, he’d be better off pulling out his circuitry and ending himself.  Before he can, one of the Varlesh (the crab people) approaches him.  It’s the same Varlesh who saved him from General Blanque and the Federats years ago, and as his friend, he wants to know what troubles him. 


The Fugitoid, recalling that the Varlesh are psychic, asks if he can determine whether he’s the true Honeycutt.  The Varlesh is confused by the question, as the fact that Honeycutt and he are talking is proof that he’s truly Honeycutt.  Fugitoid explains the situation, that just because he has Honeycutt’s memories, it doesn’t mean that he’s Honeycutt, as Honeycutt’s body died long ago.  The Varlesh suggests that if a person were to cut off their hand, the hand would cease to be that person, but the person would remain.  The same with the leg and any other extremity or organ… including the brain.  The Varlesh says that even if Honeycutt’s body and brain were destroyed, so long as his mind and memories survive, then the Fugitoid is Honeycutt.  Taking comfort in this, the Fugitoid thanks his old friend and departs.  As he leaves, the Varlesh remarks that the Fugitoid has “a kindly soul”.

The Fugitoid regroups with the Turtles and tells them that he "found himself", so to speak.  Raphael apologizes for causing the whole mess and the Fugitoid forgives him.  As they leave D’Hoonib, we’re left with a quote from Sherlock Holmes: “I am a brain… The rest of me is mere appendix.”


Turtle Tips:

*This story takes place during the six month gap in TMNT(Vol. 4) #5 when the Turtles were hanging out with the Utroms and the Fugitoid.

*Professor Honeycutt had his brain swapped with the SAL5000 droid way back in Fugitoid (microseries) #1.  He met the Varlesh (the crab person) in that same story.

*Among the Fugitoid’s memories are when he first met the Turtles, which occurred in TMNT (Vol. 1) #5.

*The menta-wave technology which the Fugitoid rediscovered in this issue will eventually be hijacked for unsavory purposes by the Utroms in the story “The Grape”.

*While it may seem strange that after all these years the Federats are still after the Fugitoid, it remains consistent with stories set in the future.  The Federats will still be chasing the Fugitoid in Gizmo and the Fugitoid #1.


Review:

The Fugitoid doesn’t get a lot of spotlighting stories, which is funny, considering he was conceived by Eastman and Laird as a solo character and only folded into the TMNT universe after the fact when his back-up strips floundered.  It’s true that the Fugitoid does work best as a supporting character and not a star act, but it’s nice for him to get the focus every now and again.  Author Andrew Bonia conceives of a plot that calls way back to the Fugitoid’s first appearance and is a sequel to that original arc in a way.  If anything, it ties up a potential loose end you may or may not have thought about.

Sci-fi technology is funny in that, being science and all, it doesn’t really take into account spiritual concepts like the “soul” or what have you.  We sort of project that onto the technology ourselves and often do so without really giving it a conscious thought.  Every time Captain Kirk steps into that teleporter and gets disintegrated, we just assume that the Captain Kirk that gets reintegrated on the other end is the same guy; we just assume his singular one-of-a-kind consciousness, be it a “soul” or have you, get’s sent across time and space with him.  But when the teleporter is just destroying one form and then making a copy of it at a distant location with the data it collected, that’s not the REAL Captain Kirk, is it?  It’s just a copy or a clone that THINKS it’s the real Captain Kirk.

And the same idea translates to the Fugitoid (or the Justice League, or Seth Brundle, etc.).  His “mind” was transferred from Honeycutt’s body and into SAL’s, but when we think of the “mind” do we mean his consciousness or just his memories?  That’s the big dilemma Fugitoid is wrestling with in this issue, and while it isn’t an entirely fresh concept for the medium (LOTS of sci-fi comics and TV shows have tackled this situation), it’s definitely one worth addressing so far as the Fugitoid is concerned.

It’s interesting to see how frustrating this whole situation is for the Fugitoid, as he can’t quantify something as intangible as the mind and struggles to come up with some sort of way to “prove” that his mind is the real deal and not just copied memories.  In the end, he accepts that there’s no scientific way to prove such a concept and instead takes comfort in the Varlesh’s more philosophical approach.  And while the Varlesh does come as a late addition to the story, he isn’t necessarily used as an easy-out, either.  The Fugitoid wants him to use his psychic powers to conveniently answer his query, but the Varlesh takes it in a different direction and doesn’t act quite so much like a magic MacGuffin.

The IDW TMNT comic would tackle this same concept, as that book deals with reincarnation and spiritualism in addition to intergalactic teleportation.  It doesn’t broach the subject quite as thoroughly as this comic, which is probably for the best, as if every single story that uses teleportation felt required to cover this same old song and dance, audiences would demand the technology be retired simply out of boredom and irritation.

Bob LeFevre’s art is chaotic, but befitting of the subject matter.  The visuals are constantly fluctuating between the present and the past and the Fugitoid shifts between memories, so the off-kilter and surreal effect gets the tone across.  I don’t much care for his Turtles and their massive egg-headed craniums, and he sometimes makes their expressions so manic that they don’t accurately reflect the tone of their dialogue (see the sneering, loony-looking Leo at the bottom panel of Page 3 as he says, “We don’t have time, Mikey, we need an exit now!”).  Still, it’s a unique-looking issue amongst the Tales catalog and the take mostly fit the story it was trying to tell.

It was nice to catch up with the Fugitoid on a more intimate level, as he’s mostly just been a hanger on or a background personality since his return in TMNT Volume 4.  While I do think he’s better as a supporting character, even supporting characters need their moment in the sun every now and again.


Grade: B (as in, “But it’s a miracle I can stomach this type of story, as I grew up reading the Spider-Man Clone Saga and it was nothing BUT this sort of shit”.) 

Gizmo and the Fugitoid #1

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Publication date: June, 1989

Story: Peter Laird and Michael Dooney
Art: Mchael Dooney
Lettering: Steve Lavigne

Summary:

Travelling a space highway in their thinking ship, ‘Soto, Gizmo Sprocket and Fluffy Brockelton figure they’ve got it made.  Responding to an ad for the Federation Army Reserve Corps, they’ll each pick up a huge check for just five weeks of service on a "tropical paradise".  Gizmo figures it’ll give him time to work on his writing career, while Fluffy’s experience in the military leaves him confident the gig will be a cakewalk.


Four and a half weeks into their tour on the festering jungle planet, the two are utterly miserable and run ragged.  Gizmo remarks that if the Federats hadn’t impounded ‘Soto when they signed up, they’d have gone AWOL weeks ago.  Suddenly, a gargantuan reptile bursts out of the trees and attacks the platoon.  It slaughters all the soldiers save Gizmo and Fluffy, who inconveniently run out of ammo.  The two make a break for it and after some distance, they lose the monster.

Trudging through the jungle, they find the overgrown remains of a SAL-400 worker droid.  Gizmo suspects that it’s been lying inactive for years, but for the most part looks intact.  Figuring it might help them find their way back to base, Gizmo does some rewiring to get the droid online.  Eventually, the droid activates, but turns out to be no mere droid: He’s Professor Honeycutt, alias the Fugitoid.  The Fugitoid explains his situation…


He used to be a scientist working for the Federats and General Blanque, but after an accident involving his menta-wave helmet, his mind was transferred into the body of his SAL droid.  Wanting the secrets to his transmat device for insidious purposes, Blanque dubbed Honeycutt a “Fugitoid” and sent his armies to capture him.  In his travels, he wound up being chased by both the Federats and the Triceratons.  Eventually, the Fugitoid decided to settle down on a planet with no intelligent life and that neither faction would find worth colonizing.  After stowing away on a garbage scow, he escaped to this “dump planet” and hoped to live a life of peace.  However, when his batteries wound down, he depowered and was apparently inactive for years.

When Gizmo tells him that the Federats have setup a base on the planet, the Fugitoid realizes he must escape at once.  Gizmo and Fluffy promise to help him and, following the flight paths of troop carriers and shuttles overhead, they spend the next four days headed toward the vehicle impound base.


Arriving, the three disguise themselves as LURPS (long-range recon patrollers) and bluff their way past the guards.  They then find the lot where ‘Soto is impounded and Gizmo uses his mental bond with the living ship wake him up (so he can knock a guard out with his driver’s side door).  They then remove the boot with the guard’s key and take off.

They decide to take cover behind a moon until their next course has been calculated.  However, before they can take off, they’re caught in a tractor beam.  Much to the Fugitoid’s horror, the beam is drawing them toward a Triceraton asteroid ship…


Turtle Tips:

*The story concludes in Gizmo and the Fugitoid #2.

*Gizmo last appeared in the story “King for a Day”, published in The Collected Gizmo.  Fluffy’s history in the military can be seen in the stories “Peace on the Line” and “Monuments”.

*Professor Honeycutt recaps the events which led to his becoming the Fugitoid, which occurred in Fugitoid (microseries) #1.  Oddly, no mention is made of the Turtles and the framing of the recap makes it appear as though the events of the micro just recently happened.

*The Gizmo comics take place in the future, sometime after TMNT Volume 4.  The Fugitoid was shown to still be wanted by the Federation as recently as Tales of the TMNT (Vol. 2) #54.

*On page 5, the photos behind the driver’s seat of ‘Soto are of characters from the Jim Lawson/Mirage series Bade Biker and Orson.


Review:

The continuing adventures of the Fugitoid!  Obviously, Eastman and Laird had wanted to do more with him after the initial outer space arc in TMNT Volume 1, but the little guy didn’t really have enough pep to carry his own ongoing or limited series.  So as they had with the Ninja Turtles, they elected to team him up again with an existing Mirage title: Gizmo.

According to the intro, Eastman and Laird had already mapped out the Fugitoid’s continuing storyline beyond his last appearance in TMNT (Vol. 1) #7, with Dooney’s characters being worked into the existing tapestry.  The result, though, is kind of weird on a chronological level.  There is no mention of the Turtles or how the Fugitoid became separated from the Utroms after his last appearance (where he went to go live in peace on their homeworld).  The recap he provides omits those adventures and goes straight from the events of the original Fugitoid microseries into the misadventure that led to his spending years inactive on a dump world.

I think they were trying to play fast and loose with continuity so as not to alienate new readers with a deluge of back story.  Keep in mind that in 1989, this was the first time the Fugitoid had been used since TMNT #7 (well, excluding the short tale “Terror by Transmat”).  In this story, the Fugitoid is deactivated for years, sort of allowing him to hibernate away the decades until his storyline catches up with Gizmo’s (whose adventures take place in the future).  Obviously, this extended hibernation period would get contradicted by TMNT Volume 4 and Tales of the TMNT Volume 2 stories, which show that the Fugitoid spent his missing time hanging out on the Utrom Homeworld, where we last saw him.

I’d recommend not thinking about it too hard (though clearly I already have).  Let’s just say that at some point between TMNT Volume 4 and Gizmo and the Fugitoid, Honeycutt got separated from the Utroms, escaped to the dump world and was deactivated for a few years until Gizmo and Fluffy found him.  Why he didn’t mention any of his adventures between his microseries and now, well, maybe he was just trying to be brisk with his life story.

Anyway, you really shouldn’t let all that silly continuity stuff bother you, because this is actually a fun and lavish-looking two-parter.  The story is very bare bones, but it’s more a means to convey Dooney’s glorious art, and he may be at his absolute career best with these issues.  There are a number of splash pages and two-page spreads that are simply eye-poppingly beautiful and he never spares the detail no matter how small his panels have to get to convey the story.  The jungle is lush and damp, the monsters are scaly and bizarre, the space vehicles are this zany mix of Buck Rogers retro and Star Wars contemporary, and the robots are all shiny as hell.  I mean, look at the Fugitoid on the bottom left of page 23; you can see the palm trees subtly reflected in his back and warped at a sideways angle.  It’s the little things like that.

Gizmo and the Fugitoid is more character-driven than it is story-driven, so the plot isn’t especially complex.  What really draws you in is the relationships shared by the cast and the friendly jabs they take at each other.  There’s a great balance between their strengths and foibles, a quality ported over from the Gizmo ongoing series, and no one feels more useful or useless than anyone else.  Fluffy’s a tough guy with a career military history, but he’s badly out of shape.  Gizmo’s a clever guy with a certain technical aptitude, but he’s got delusions of grandeur and is always looking for the easy way.  And the Fugitoid is of course a genius, but he’s also a trouble-magnet.

There’s a great dynamic going on and everybody is allotted their fair share of opportunities to both screw up and save the day.  It’s this sort of balance I appreciate in ensemble stories more than anything else, as there’s nothing worse than characters who are a designated “comedy relief fuckup” or "infallible god that can do no wrong".

Not much else to say.  While the story isn’t the most engaging, the gorgeous art and colorful characters certainly are, and they ought to draw you into the tale.  And at any rate, it’s fun to see a spinoff story staring one of the TMNT’s recurring characters and their adventures away from the main title.


Grade: B+ (as in, “Boy, I wish I had a bigger scanner so I could show you all the beautiful two-page spreads and also that I wasn’t too lazy to bother syncing the page scans together in photoshop”.)

Gizmo and the Fugitoid #2

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Publication date: July, 1989

Story: Peter Laird and Michael Dooney
Art: Mchael Dooney
Lettering: Steve Lavigne

Summary:

Gizmo, Fluffy and the Fugitoid are taken aboard the Triceraton asteroid ship and the Triceraton Commander issues an ultimatum: If the Fugitoid doesn’t build the transmat, his friends will be thrown out the airlock.  With no real choice, the Fugitoid agrees and Gizmo and Fluffy are taken to the brig.


Months later, the asteroid ship has docked at the Triceraton Homeworld.  Gizmo has spent the time working on his writing, but can’t find any inspiration in this “genre”.  He and Fluffy are sent to do more clean-up duty, apparently both irritated that they haven’t figured out a way to break free yet.  Gizmo runs a floor buffer over a bar of soap and sends it rocketing across the room at high speed.  Feeling inspired, they go to the janitor’s closet to rig up some more “weapons”.

Hitching two large buffers together, they ride them down the corridor toward the Triceraton guards.  The buffers fire some soap at the guards and then plow into them, knocking them out.  Gizmo and Fluffy use the opportunity to find the Fugitoid in his workshop.  The Fugitoid tells them that he can’t leave now, as he must finish the device.  Gizmo and Fluffy are confused, but agree to cause a distraction and give the Fugitoid half an hour to finish his work.

Gizmo and Fluffy make it to the armory and arm themselves as the Triceratons approach.  Gizmo grabs the largest gun he can find, much to Fluffy’s disapproval, and fires it.  The kickback sends Gizmo through a wall and Fluffy informs him that the gun he used was built to be installed on tanks.  The Triceratons seize the two and prepare to execute them, when suddenly the Fugitoid activates his machine.


Apparently, rather than a transmat, he built a new menta-wave device powered by the fusion reactors of the Triceraton Homeworld.  The Fugitoid broadcasts a psychic message to all living creatures in the Triceraton and Federation systems.  He tells them that the transmat could have been used for peace, but because of their thirst for war and conquest, he has no choice but to take the technology out of their grasp forever.  The Fugitoid bids the universe farewell and overloads his circuitry, wiping his memory clean.

Gizmo and Fluffy find the Fugitoid’s body and a Triceraton technician confirms that his memory has been erased and he shows no signs of life.  Apparently moved by the Fugitoid’s words, the Triceraton Commander allows Gizmo and Fluffy to leave with the body so they can give it a proper burial.

On the surface of a nearby planet, they place the Fugitoid’s body under a tree and Fluffy suggests that Gizmo write a eulogy for him.  Gizmo takes out his electronic textpad but can’t write anything due to a system error.  The message tells him, “To restore system memory, insert DMA cable into Class-C memory unit”.  They decide to hook the textpad up to the Fugitoid’s Class-C memory unit and in doing so the Fugitoid comes back online.

The Fugitoid explains that he used the menta-wave technology to transfer his mind into Gizmo’s textpad, thereby faking his own death.  Gizmo and Fluffy are thrilled, though Gizmo is less than pleased that the Fugitoid had to erase all his document files in order to fit his memory in the textpad.


Fluffy tells the Fugitoid that now that the Triceratons and the Federats think he’s dead, he’s free to do whatever he wants.  Suddenly, a pair of Utroms, having received the psychic message, appear in a flash of light.  They invite the Fugitoid to return with them once more to the Utrom Homeworld and he accepts.  After bidding the Fugitoid farewell, Gizmo and Fluffy pile into ‘Soto and blast off.  Gizmo says he’s through trying to be a travel writer, but he has other plans…

Epilogue:

Several months later, down on Earth, a child leaves a comic shop in a hurry.  Running past several alien neighbors, he reaches his apartment stoop and sits down to read “The Unlikely X-Bots” (which has a cover featuring three familiar faces).


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from Gizmo and the Fugitoid #1.

*The setting of Earth populated by humans and aliens may indicate these stories take place after TMNT (Vol. 4) #5 (when the Utroms initiated First Contact), but before Tales of the TMNT (Vol. 2) #69 (when global warming destroys the Earth).

*The Fugitoid’s mind is apparently only 50gb or less.

*This issue also contained a bonus pin-up of Gizmo, Fluffy and the Fugitoid by Peter Laird.  According to the foreword from the previous issue, this is the piece  that inspired Dooney to do the miniseries.


Review:

The second half of the Gizmo and the Fugitoid miniseries was a little less exciting than the first half.  It relies heavily on matters of convenience to get the characters out of their various jams and by the end the credibility almost snaps.  The Triceratons apparently just let their captives mull around unguarded for hours at a time to do whatever they want, be it plotting an escape or sabotaging the machines they’re supposed to be building.  I guess it’s consistent for the Triceratons, who are typically portrayed as ferocious warriors if not especially intelligent.  The ending, where the Triceraton Commander allows Gizmo and Fluffy (whom he was seconds away from executing) to leave with the Fugitoid’s body because “meh”… That was simply a means to get the comic over with before the pages ran out.

So while it is a step down in its conclusion, Gizmo and the Fugitoid #2 is still enjoyable for all the same reasons the first installment was.  Though the Fugitoid takes a backseat for most of the issue, Gizmo’s and Fluffy’s dynamic is as fun as it ever was and there’s entertainment to be had in watching them blunder through their escape attempt.  What was great about the Gizmo ongoing series, and this miniseries too, is that Gizmo and Fluffy aren’t idiots, but they aren’t geniuses, either.  They usually wing their way through delicate situations and succeed with equal parts resourcefulness and dumb luck.  It makes their antics spontaneous and unpredictable, as they have to go through a lot of trial and error to make it out on top.

In contrast to the lush jungles of the previous issue, this issue takes place in the sterile environment of a space station.  While the environments can get a little monotonous, the metallic corridors illustrate Dooney’s skill at making everything so damn shiny.  Once again, the reflective surface on the Fugitoid proves how much effort Dooney was exerting in each panel, as the Fugitoid is constantly reflecting the environment around him with the images warped to the curvature of his torso.  It’s really quite glorious.

What’s interesting about this miniseries in the grand scheme of the Mirage universe is that it concludes the Fugitoid’s storyline.  The Triceratons and the Federats think he’s dead and he can now live in peace, both among the Utroms or outside their jurisdiction (where he’d appear to be just another SAL unit).  If you’re reading things chronologically, it’s a solid sendoff to the character, as he finally gets the better of the two opposing forces that made him a Fugitoid in the first place.  There’s also the lingering potential that his words may have an impact on the Triceraton/Federation war and help bring an end to it (though that might be hoping for too much).

So if you’re interested in what’s essentially the “end” of the Fugitoid’s narrative, then this miniseries is vital reading.  And if you’re strictly a Gizmo fan, then this is another fun romp for the pair and is just one more of their episodic misadventures.  And for everyone else, there’s a lot of gorgeous Dooney art to feast your eyes on.  It’s a pretty great mini, all things considered.


Grade: B (as in, “But for such a pacifist, the Fugitoid’s old action figure sure came with a lot of weapons”.)

TMNT (IDW) #35

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Publication date: June 18, 2014

Story: Kevin Eastman, Bobby Curnow, Tom Waltz
Script: Tom Waltz
Art: Mateus Santolouco, Mike Henderson (page 3)
Colors: Ronda Pattison
Letters: Shawn Lee
Editor: Bobby Curnow

Summary:

After procuring some pizzas from Woody, Mikey and Raph head over to Old Hob’s apartment/HQ to see if they can’t get on his good side.  Raph doesn’t exactly care for this alliance, but Mikey is confident that there’s good in Hob despite all their altercations in the past.


At a cemetery, Casey is standing over his mother’s grave and reminiscing about how proud she was when he got his hockey scholarship.  Suddenly, Hun and the Purple Dragons show up and they mean business.

At Hob’s apartment, Mikey waltzes in with the pizzas (which greatly pleases the dunderheaded Slash).  The Turtles are then sprung with two surprises.  The first is a moronic pigeon mutant named Pigeon Pete; the first of Hob’s failed attempts at making a mutant army.  The second is Lindsey Baker, the Stockgen employee Hob kidnapped.


Back at the cemetery, Hun tells Casey that he gave him his chance to either join him or leave.  Now, he has no choice but to kill him since he chooses survival over being eliminated by the Shredder.  Casey isn’t surprised and puts on his mask.  Several Purple Dragons attack him and he takes them down.

Back at the apartment, Mikey and Raph aren’t too thrilled with Hob’s methods of building his army.  Hob explains that he had no choice, as creating mutants requires serious knowhow (and Pigeon Pete is proof of that).  And at any rate, he says that Lindsey isn’t as innocent as they think, as she was knee-deep in all of Stockgen’s illegal research and experimentation and is partially responsible for tormenting Slash and even Splinter (when Stockgen had him held captive).  Despite that, Raph cuts Lindsey loose and encourages Hob to try and recruit her “politely”.  To that end, Hob pulls out a syringe of Splinter’s blood which immediately capture’s Lindsey’s interest.


At the cemetery, Casey has been worn down by the Dragons and Hun is about to deliver the finishing blow to his ex-son.  Before he can strike, he’s violently tased by Nobody, who is taking Harold’s new exo-suit out for a test run.  Using the anti-gravity gauntlets and lasers, Nobody keeps the Dragons and Hun at bay, then escapes with Casey.

At the apartment, Lindsey explains that the psychotropic serum was a key ingredient in creating mutants with higher intellects.  When Splinter and the Turtles were lost in the Foot break-in, the psychotropic serum was lost with them, which is why their further experiments (Slash) proved uncontrollable.  Lindsey says she’s willing to work with Hob to continue her own research, but on the condition he provides her with a better lab and months to prepare.  Overhearing the story, Slash decides he doesn’t want to wait months and wants to be smart NOW.  He snatches up the syringe and injects himself with Splinter’s blood (and the psychotropic serum).

Slash goes out of control and begins attacking everyone.  While the Turtles try and keep him at bay, Hob grabs a powerful taser gun and subdues him.  The jolt brings Slash to his senses and he eloquently apologizes for his behavior.  Lindsey and Hob are pleased to see that they’ve found the key to making mutants.


On a rooftop somewhere, Nobody reveals her identity as Angel (though Casey had already figured it out).  She says that she guessed Casey would be at the cemetery since he always goes there when he’s depressed.  Angel tells Casey not to give up hope just because he’s lost his dad.  Rather, he should try to forget the “losers” in his life and move forward down his own path, like she has.

Down in the sewer lair, Leo and Splinter are continuing their discussion, seemingly unaware that several glowing red eyes are watching them from the darkness.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from TMNT (IDW) #34.  The story is continues in TMNT (IDW) #36.

*Pigeon Pete is a character who originally appeared in the 2012 Nickelodeon TMNT cartoon, in the episode “The Gauntlet”.  Michelangelo also had a pet pigeon named Pete in the 1987 Fred Wolf TMNT cartoon, in the episode “What’s Michelangelo Good For?”, but odds are they aren’t related.

*The Foot absconded with the Turtles and Splinter (and the secrets of the psychotropic serum) in TMNT (IDW) #2.  Stockgen acquired Splinter’s blood in TMNT (IDW) #9.

*This issue also included a model sheet of Angel as Nobody by Santolouco.

*This issue was originally published with 4 variant covers: Cover A by Santolouco, Cover B by Eastman and Pattison, Cover RI by Ken Garing, and Cover RE Kevin Eastman Fan Club SDCC exclusive by Eastman, Peter Laird and Steve Lavigne.


Review:

Ha!  Pigeon Pete!  I guess IDW got me again with a character reveal I didn’t see coming.  Hey, I’m not complaining.  I relish any surprises I can get, these days.  Pete was a one-off gag character from the Nick show and so far there haven’t been many Nick references in the IDW book, making his inclusion truly a surprise.  And all things considered, this comic was in dire need of a little levity, so a goofy character like Pete goes a long way.

Hob’s story arc is moving forward and it’s been baby steps for over a year now.  Its slow burn, but the progression has been very organic.  He isn’t building this army from nothing and he’s really had to out it together piecemeal, a little at a time.  First he had to steal some ooze, then he had to recruit Slash, then he had to negotiate with Splinter, then he had to get some mutagen, then he had to get Stockgen out of the picture, then he had to get a scientist to figure out how the ooze/mutagen/psychotropic serum works… and NOW he’s ready to go.

It’s agonizing build-up, but it represents a sort of consistent internal logic that maintains the integrity of this universe.  It also helps to construct the character of Hob, who up until now hasn’t done much of anything but talk big about his plans.  We’re getting a bead on this guy and he’s definitely setting himself up as a self-made villain (or antihero).  He’s been WORKING for this and we’ve been following him every step of the way for over a year.  HIS payoff is OUR payoff and there’s something to be said for that.  No, Hob isn't a smart guy or a strong guy, but he knows how to surround himself with smart people and strong people, which makes him manipulative and clever.

I also dug Mikey’s and Raph’s reaction to stepping in on the whole hostage situation.  Rather than immediately escalate to a fight, the Turtles hear Hob out and consider his side of the situation; Lindsey is hardly the victim you might take her for on face value.  Even Raph pragmatically works through the matter in his head, realizing that Hob’s mutant army might come in handy regarding Splinter’s war with the Foot Clan.  And, like it or not, they DO need to maintain their alliance with Hob.  It’s a “deal with the devil” scenario that incidentally fits in perfectly with Old Hob’s name.  Likewise, it harkens back to that conversation the Turtles shared from TMNT #33 where they explicitly state that they aren't heroes (hence how they're willing to look the other way in regards to Hob's illegal activities).

Slash finally has two brain cells to rub together and I’m good with that.  Lumbering numbskull villains get really old, really fast and the IQ booster gives Slash some opportunities to grow.  Maybe he’ll end up like the Corey Feldman incarnation from the 2012 cartoon who is a kinda-sorta antagonist with more of a skewed moral compass than a truly malevolent personality.  And since this Slash is already a fusion with Tokka, maybe we’ll be seeing Rahzar sometime soon.  One can only hope.

Casey’s story was the weak point of the issue and it continues a trend I’m downright sick of at this point: Casey getting trashed and having to be rescued for dramatic value.  Jeez, when was the last time he was a fucking badass in this book?  The 2012 Annual?  Yeah, he puts up a good fight, but he still loses and has to have his fat pulled from the fryer at the last second (incidentally, shouldn’t Casey have also been electrocuted by that taser since Hun was holding him when he got zapped?).  Casey needs to bust some heads and come out on top for a change; it’s been long enough.

But at least Angel is growing and improving as a character.  You really SHOULD follow her lead, Casey.  At least she knows how to win a fight once in a while.

On the off chance that last rant sounded too bitter: The cliffhanger has me psyched.  Aw yeah, my all-time favorite TMNT villain is just around the corner!  (Both literally and figuratively.)


Grade: B (as in, “But now that we’ve got Pigeon Pete and Slash building up Hob’s army, the possibilities are endless.  I’ve got my fingers crossed for Pizzaface!”)

TMNT: Turtles in Time #1

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Publication date: June 18, 2014

Writer: Paul Allor
Artist: Ross Campbell
Colorist: Bill Crabtree
Letterer: Shawn Lee
Editor: Bobby Curnow

“Turtles in Time, Part 1”

Summary:

On prehistoric Earth, the Turtles are running from a stampede of dinosaurs.  Turns out the dinosaurs are running from several Utrom hunters riding armored hydrosaurs.  The Utrom hunters nab Raphael with a gooey net and drag him off, leaving the other three Turtles to run screaming from a T-rex.  The Turtles take cover in a cave and Donatello postulates that the T-rex was just protecting her nest, not looking for chow.  He’s right and once the T-rex shuffles off, the Turtles go looking for Raph.


They’re confused as to how they wound up on prehistoric Earth, as the last thing they remember was training at home.  Suddenly, Renet appears through a temporal portal and is glad to have found her friends.  They try to get the skinny from her, but her time scepter starts malfunctioning and as quickly as she came, she disappears (off to find a repairman).  The Turtles are left with no more answers than they had before.


At the Utrom camp, the scientists are examining Raph and determine that unlike the other reptiles, he’s actually intelligent.  As they discuss the diplomatic crisis that could result in their actions, the other Turtles find the camp and Mikey comes up with an idea on how to free Raph.

In his cage, Raph befriends a baby protoceratops named Pepperoni and gives her a little bandana made from his leg-wrappings.  Suddenly, Mikey swoops down on a pterodactyl and dumps rocks on all the Utroms.  As they scatter in confusion, Leo takes out their robot bodies while Donatello frees several of the dinosaurs.  By the time he frees Raph, Leo has the Utroms bound.


Before they can get to the bottom of things, the Utrom military transport team arrives and starts shooting at the Turtles.  Donatello has an idea and leads the Utroms to the T-rex nest.  As the Turtles hide, the Utroms run in terror from the angry carnivore.

That evening, in a cave, the Turtles cook a pizza made from roughage and ponder if they’ll ever get home.  Suddenly, they vanish into thin air (leaving the pizza behind for Pepperoni to munch on).


At the Utrom camp, the scientists and military are impressed with the fighting potential of warrior reptiles and feel Ambassador Quanin should be told of their existence immediately.  One scientist says that recruiting such warriors might be too much of a hassle, and looking at a triceratops in one of the cages, comes up with a better idea.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from TMNT Annual 2014.  The story continues in TMNT: Turtles in Time #2.

*The Utroms were shown collecting dinosaurs on Earth for genetic experimentation in TMNT: Utrom Empire #1.

*Leo mentions their fight with General Krang from TMNT (IDW) #20.

*At the time this issue was published, TMNT Annual 2014 had not been completed and would not be published for several months.  The opening recap (cheekily) cops to this and assures readers that the confusion is all part of the narrative experience.

*This issue was originally published with 3 variant covers: Regular Cover by David Peterson, Subscription Cover by Ross Campbell, and Hastings Exclusive cover by Campbell.


Review:

Turtles in Time looks like it’s going to be a tonal antithesis to Allor’s last miniseries, Utrom Empire.  Whereas that one was brimming over with political intrigue and heavy moral quandaries, Turtles in Time is just a lot of goofy, lighthearted fun.  Or it is so far, anyway.

The Turtles take to their situation with a snarky sense of humor and everything is played for laughs.  There are a few running gags in this issue and the entire tone encourages you to relax and just go with the madness.  How did Michelangelo learn how to wrangle and ride a freakin’ pterodactyl?  Who cares!  It was just supposed to be cool.

Apparently TMNT Annual 2014 was supposed to set some of this stuff up, at least regarding how the Turtles know Renet, but that thing isn’t going to be hitting the shelves anytime soon (editor Bobby Curnow says mid-August at the absolute earliest).  Be that as it may, the miniseries is intended to open in medias res, with the characters as confused as the readers, so the fact that it was published out of sequence isn’t a deal-breaker by any means.  And all you people out there reading this review for the first time two years after the issue’s publication, it isn’t even a problem.

Ross Campbell’s style is a solid fit for the irreverent attitude of the story and he nails all the running gags.  The shtick involving rock-throwing would have fallen flat with the wrong artist, but Campbell’s sense of layout and expression makes it cute instead of annoying.  He also draws all the dinosaurs with feathers in an attempt at paleological accuracy.  A nice gesture and I’ve no qualms with feathered dinos, though if we’re getting fussy about “accuracy” then the Turtles should have had trouble breathing in the late Cretaceous period, what with Earth’s oxygen levels being totally different, but what did I say at the start of this review?  Relax.  It’s supposed to be fun.

The jokey nature of the issue also means that you’ll breeze through it really fast, but Campbell’s art will also have to flipping back over the pages and digesting each panel for detail, so it evens out.  Really, the issue’s biggest mistake was leaving Pepperoni behind on prehistoric Earth.  That was a cruel tease and I demand she return as IDW’s answer to Klunk.


Grade: B (as in, “Beats the hell out of ‘Jurassic Park III’, anyway”.)

Pics from Heroes Con in Charlotte, NC!

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 If you're wondering why there weren't any updates this weekend, or why it took 4 days for your comments to get approved, it's because I was attending Heroes Con in Charlotte, NC!  I was working the We Love Fine booth on Saturday and Sunday (with Friday off to see the show).  It was a great event and, in regards to this site, I got to meet a couple Mirage TMNT icons!

First up was Michael Dooney:


Dude was great and full of energy (I got to him first thing in the morning, since I had an Exhibitor's Badge).  Had a short talk about my favorite piece of his, which I also got signed:


I've gone on about it before, but that cover of his to the second printing of TMNT #4 (more popularly recognized as the NES game box art) is my all-time favorite Turtle piece.  Now it's even better!

Next up, Eric Talbot:



He actually wasn't on the list of guests, so I didn't know he would be there.  It was a pleasant surprise to get to meet another of my favorite Turtle artists.  If I HAD known, though, I'd have brought my copy of TMNT #17 for him to sign.  As luck would have it, I did have on hand my copy of TMNT #14 (which he inked):


Kevin Eastman was also at the show, which is why I had #14 with me, but my work schedule for the weekend just didn't align with his availability (I had Friday off to do the con, but he was only there Saturday and Sunday).  Maybe another time.

On a non-TMNT related note, I also got to meet another great in the world of comics.

Uncle Scrooge and Donald Duck master, Don Rosa:


I'm sure you've heard stories about what a great guy he is, but I assure you that they don't do his demeanor justice.  Dude was a blast to chat with and he had a lot of fun scribbling in my copy of The Life and Times of Scrooge McDuck:


Incidentally, I was the first person at the Con to hit him up and he was happy to note that with a "#1 in Charlotte".

It was a great show and I know a lot of Turtle fans were there beside me (there MUST have been, considering Eastman had the longest line in the place!).  I hope everyone who attended had as much fun as I did and, if you've never been, it's a Con I'd highly recommend.  It's a comic book convention that's actually ABOUT comic books.  I thought they'd gone extinct ages ago.


TMNT New Animated Adventures #12

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Publication date: June 25, 2014

Contents:

*“Postmark Panic”
*“Pizza Prize”
*“LEGO TMNT, Part 2”


Turtle Tips:

*These stories are continues from TMNT New Animated Adventures #11.  The story continues in TMNT New Animated Adventures #13.

*This issue was originally published with 3 variant covers: Regular Cover by Dario Brizuela, Cover RI by Ben Costa, Subscription Cover by “LEGO” (but actually Bryan Turner).




Postmark Panic

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Originally published in: TMNT New Animated Adventures #12
Publication date: June 25, 2014

Story: Landry Q. Walker
Art: Chad Thomas
Colors: Heather Breckel
Letters: Shawn Lee
Edits: Bobby Curnow

“Postmark Panic”

Summary:

Down in the lair, Mikey (under April’s suggestion) has decided to express himself artistically.  After videotaping a ninja training session, he mailed the cassette to “One Minute Masterpieces”, a funniest home videos TV program.  Leo is, of course, incensed, as the video could blow their secret existence to the world and the Turtles immediately head to the post box.


After discovering that the mail has been taken to the post office already, the Turtles change destinations.  Meanwhile, Karai watches them and decides that if the package is important to the Turtles, the Foot must have it.  Meanwhile, the Kraang watches her and decide that if the package is important to the Foot, the Kraang must have it.  Meanwhile, Jack Kurtzman watches the aliens and decides that if the package is important to the Kraang, he must have it.  Meanwhile, Pigeon Pete watches Kurtzman eat a sandwich and decides that if the package is important to a guy with a sandwich then it must have breadcrumbs in it.


At the post office, the Turtles find the package amongst a maze of conveyer belts and sorting devices.  Karai intercepts the package from them, but the Kraang intercept the package from Karai.  However, Kurtzman intercepts the package from the Kraang.  HOWEVER, Pigeon Pete intercepts the package from Kurtzman.  After a brief scuffle, Leo finally decides to end the madness by chucking the package into a shredding machine.  The Turtles promptly vanish with a smoke bomb.


Down in the lair, Mikey shows his brothers and April the backup of his video.  Much to their surprise, it wasn’t actually one of THEIR training sessions; it was one of April’s.  More so, it was a training session where April accidentally bumped into a table and catapulted a pie into her own face.  Furious, April splats a pie into Mikey’s face and storms off, though this only serves to inspire Mikey to film a sequel.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from TMNT New Animated Adventures #11.  The story continues in “Pizza Prize”.

*Pigeon Pete first appeared in the season 1 episode “The Gauntlet”.  He made a brief cameo in the season 2 episode “Metalhead Rewired”, where the Turtles freed him (and other mutants) from the clutches of the Kraang.

*Jack Kurtzman first appeared in the season 2 episode “The Kraang Conspiracy” and later appeared in “The Manhattan Project, Part 2” (or “Wormquake, Part 2”; I don't know if they ever settled on one title for that two-parter).


Review:

Apparently June was the month of Pigeon Pete.  He made his IDW comic debut over in TMNT (IDW) #35 and now he’s made a comeback of sorts to the Nickelodeon universe via this issue of TMNT New Animated Adventures.  There’s just so much potential in that weird little guy.

Walker’s script is a lot of silly fun and probably the goofiest long form story that IDW’s cartoon-based comic has produced yet.  The “inception” moment of spies spying on other spies, the fact that everybody wants something without even knowing what it is, and the whole game of “keep away” in the post office were pure cartoon silliness. 

By focusing more on humor than action or drama, I think TMNT New Animated Adventures is beginning to find its comfort zone.  It can’t do anything involving story arcs or character development as it can't contradict or interfere with the cartoon.  As a result, anything “dramatic” is forbidden from actually carrying any weight.  Luckily. comedy remains a viable alternative and their recent format of shorter gag pieces, 2 or 3 per issue, has been working really well.  I don’t know how much life New Animated Adventures has left in it (it sells really poorly on the direct market and did IDW cancel the Micro Fun Packs?), but I hope it keeps this format for the remainder of its run.  It definitely works.

Now, to address the elephant in the room, doesn’t this story seem just a little… anachronistic?  I mean, Mikey mailing a video cassette to a TV home movies program?  Now, as a person who lived through the Betamax and VHS era as well as the brutal hell that was America’s Funniest Home Videos and America’s Funniest People, all this seems perfectly normal on the surface.  But it isn’t 1993 anymore.  I mean, the kids whom this book is aimed at were all BORN after video cassettes had been retired, to say nothing of their e-mail generation being unfamiliar with snail mail (how many of these kids have ever written a letter, put it in an envelope, stamped it and then dropped it in a box on the street corner?).

I mean, I’m sure the tykes reading this (if there ARE any, given the sales numbers) will be able to follow along with the silliness since the script is pretty intuitive (the package contains proof of the TMNT’s existence and everybody wants it; that’s enough for a kid to follow), but the plot still relies on technology, TV programming and circumstances that pretty much don’t exist anymore.

It’d be like if Mikey disguised himself as a milkman to infiltrate a video game arcade because the Foot are going to send an explosive Candygram there.  But oh no!  Mikey spent all his quarters and needs change for the pay phone!  How will he get out of this one?  Maybe he can borrow some from the newsboy on the corner that’s crying headlines from the evening edition.

Oh whatever.  This issue had Pigeon Pete in it, so everything else can slide.  (Also, there's some great work from Chad Thomas, who seems to be getting more and more in the groove with each issue, pushing the boundaries of how cartoony and exaggerated he can make everyone’s facial expressions, which I like.)


Grade: B (as in, “But the Turtles sort of leave their buddy Kurtzman in the hands of the Foot and the Kraang at the end of this story”.)

Pizza Prize

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Originally published in: TMNT New Animated Adventures #12
Publication date: June 25, 2014

Story: Landry Q. Walker
Art: Marcelo Ferreira
Colors: Heather Breckel
Letters: Shawn Lee
Edits: Bobby Curnow

“Pizza Prize”

Summary:

Down in the lair, the Turtles are fighting over the last two slices of pizza.  April comes up with a solution to prove who is truly worthy of the slices.  She challenges the Turtles to find a buoy in the shipping channel south of Manhattan.  The first one to reach it and send her a photo on their T-phone gets the pizza.

The Turtles immediately race to the buoy, swimming out into the stormy waters to reach it.  They arrive at roughly the same time and all attempt to send their pictures, but can’t get any reception.


It doesn’t matter anyway, as Splinter and April have both helped themselves to the last two slices.  Splinter tells April that her use of deception and misdirection have the marks of a true ninja about them.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from “Postmark Panic”.  The story continues in TMNT New Animated Adventures #13.


Review:

Cute.  Short.  Not much else to say.  I do like Ferreira’s art, though.  He draws a really sassy-looking April and his layouts are very energetic and off-kilter.  I hope he gets a shot at one of the longer form stories soon.


Grade: N/A (as in, “New Animated Adventures #12 was apparently brought to you by the letter P.  Postmark Panic, Pigeon Pete, Pizza Prize… Alliteration sure is fun!”)

Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #14

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Publication date: May 1 – 28, 2014

Script: Landry Walker
Art: Cosmo White
Colours: Jason Cardy
Colour Assist: James Stayte, K. Nicholson
Letters: Alex Foot

“Paranoia”

Summary:

At a Kraang facility, the Turtles are trying to figure out what weird purple chemical concoction the aliens are so diligently protecting.  In the heat of battle, Raph busts the stasis tube, spraying himself and all his brothers with the chemical.  By all visual evidence, it had no effect on them, so after trashing the Kraang and collecting a sample they decide to go home.  Mikey is especially in a hurry to go home, as Splinter is on a meditation retreat and he wants to throw a party.  Leo, of course, says it’s out of the question.


Down in the lair, the Turtles are sitting on the couch and stewing.  Mikey is mad that Leo won’t let him have a party or do anything fun, ever.  Leo is mad because Mikey invited April anyway and undermined his authority.  Raph is mad because Leo never wants to get proactive and take the fight to the Shredder.  Don is mad because all his brothers ever do is fight and destroy all his inventions.

A little while later, April arrives with party provisions and finds all the Turtles wrecking the living room, fighting with each other.  They each storm off to their own room, leaving April confused.  She goes to Leo who claims that Raph and his brothers are coordinating a coup to oust him as leader.  Suddenly, Raph barges in with his own suspicions.  He accuses Leo of working covertly for the Shredder and the two get into a fight.


April is then pulled aside by Mikey, who is wearing a tinfoil hat.  Mikey says that the tinfoil hat is the only thing protecting him from Zorblixion alien parasitic mind lasers, which are the cause of his brothers’ behavior.  He then notices April isn’t wearing a tinfoil hat and accuses her of being one of “them”.

April tries her luck with Donatello next, but Donnie is on to her.  He says that she and his brothers are all just “actors” in costumes and that everything in his whole life is just a monitored setup.  Don then attacks Mikey and the two tumble into the living room where Leo and Raph are also fighting.

Naturally, April hasn’t a clue how to handle this situation, but luckily Donatello was already working on analyzing an antidote to the Kraang chemical before he went bonkers.  Following his computer’s instructions, April synthesizes a cure and pours it into a Super Soaker.


Zooming around the living room in a tiny go-kart, she sprays the Turtles with the cure and a few minutes later they come to their senses.  The Turtles thank her for saving the day… just as Splinter comes home.  Leo insists that the mess isn’t the result of a party and Splinter merely turns right back around and goes on a second meditation retreat.  Mikey is thrilled, though, as Splinter’s absence means they can now have a REAL party.


Turtle Tips:

*This story is continued from Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #13.  The story continues in Nickelodeon TMNT (Panini) #15.


Review:

“Paranoia” was a great script and I’m glad it received the double-length treatment in Panini’s TMNT magazine, as it gave Walker more room to wring the most out of the situations.  Each of the Turtles’ conspiracy theories reflects their personalities or positions on the team and it’s a lot of fun.  Leo is afraid someone wants to steal his job as leader, Raph suspects his brothers are working for the Foot, Mikey’s wild imagination gets the better of him and Donatello constructs an elaborate “Truman Show” style scenario that sort of speaks to his ego.  It’s the hallmark of a good story when you wish the comic had been longer.

There is one issue with “Paranoia” and it has to do with its similarities to the season one episode of the Nickelodeon TMNT cartoon, “Parasitica”.  In that story, all the Turtles save Mikey get infected by mutant parasites and go crazy.  Donatello begins synthesizing a cure before the parasites get to him, leaving Mikey to finish his work.  The setup is very similar to what April goes through and how she ultimately resolves the conflict, however, the tone of “Parasitica” was very much horror while “Paranoia” was definitely played for laughs.  A tongue-in-cheek callback to that episode might have helped, though I think the similarities in titles might have actually been said callback.

More great line work from Cosmo White, too, with the usual glowing colors from Cardy and helpers.  Now that IDW and Panini have begun sharing their talent (in lieu of sharing their actual content), I’d definitely like to see White pop up on the TMNT New Animated Adventures book.  I’m not sure how his pencils would look in conjunction with Heather Breckel’s style of coloring (which is very different from Jason Cardy’s), but I’d sure like to see it.

The only thing holding “Paranoia” back is that it’s a little derivative.  But if you can look past its similarities with “Parasitica”, it’s actually a lot more fun.


Grade: C+ (as in, “Can’t tell if that Turtle go-kart is an actual toy vehicle tie-in or not.  The Playmates toys are so goofy, I’d believe it”.)

Support a new Collected Gizmo on Kickstarter or just bug Michael Dooney about it!

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A Gizmo fan recently pointed me toward this post from Michael Dooney.  Apparently, he's mulling over a potential new (and more complete) collection of his Gizmo series to be funded via Kickstarter.

If you like Gizmo, or just great Dooney art, then give him some feedback at his site and hopefully we can see it happen!


TMNT (1987) Season 5, Part 3 Review

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Alright, so I've gotten around to another batch of episode from season 5 of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon produced by Fred Wolf.  These aren't great episodes.

TMNT (1987) Season 5, Part 3 Review at Adventures in Poor Taste.

Well, the Casey Jones episode is pretty great.  The rest range from average to incompetent, but that's just par for the course as far as this show is concerned.  I AM looking forward to the next review, though, as then I'll finally be getting to "Planet of the Turtleoids".

But before I can get to that, I've gotta get through this.


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